BUT there are always a million reasons why you never do
....................
Not
yet Nigel, its only 5 to 6,
I'm waiting
for the Easter bun
To bring my
chocolate fix
Not yet
Nigel, there's such a lot to do
The rabbits
chewed the carpet
So I've put
them in stew
Not yet
Nigel, its time to cook some lunch
But its not
quite 11 yet
I think
i'll call it "brunch"
Not yet
Nigel, its time watch TV
Nigellas on
and licking spoons
Food
porn it is to me
Not yet
Nigel, I'm off to B & Q
I'm British, on bank holidays
Its what
the natives do
Not yet
Nigel its time to make some tea
Shopping for
shelves and gloss paint
Gives an
appetite you see
Not yet
Nigel, I'm tired and need a snooze
My feet up
on the sofa
And I'll
watch the evening news
Not yet
Nigel,its time to go to bed
I've drunk
too much (of gin I think)
I have a
pounding head!
Oh shit
Nigel the house is burning down
I didn't
check the smoke alarm
It didn't
make a sound
I'm DEAD
Nigel, whatever shall i do
I should
have checked the batteries
like you
had told me to
Tomorrow
check your smoke alarm,
No go do
it NOW!
Cos West Yorkshire Fire and Rescue
SMOKE
ALARMS LET YOU WATCH YOUR HOUSE BURN DOWN FROM THE OUTSIDE
(but contrary to what they will have youthink they don't reduce the risk of you having a fire - they just prevent you dying in it.